You don't get it.
I remember every single argument we had. Every laughter I made. Every tear I've spilled. And that very first night we met.
Barely thinking, you jumped off the back of your car and started unbuttoning your jacket. My heart was racing. I almost wanted to believe it but I couldn't bring myself to do so. Before I knew it, I felt warmth around my bare arms and you standing right behind me, covering me from the cold with your jacket.
"You looked like you were freezing."Do you remember that? Do you remember that movie we watched? The pyramid of beer cans we built? Wall-E? South Park? The balloon I gave you because you stayed up writing your paper til 5.
I do. And I even if I hate admitting it and even if it's futile saying it, I miss you terribly.
---
Waking up to cold winter mornings have never been so dreadful.
And it's an even more god awful feeling when you've lost it all in a blink of an eye.
I'd take it all back if I had the chance. But I know it'd hurt just the same, if not more. It's always been a game and I've always lost.