Music: Something by Taylor Swift
I wonder how I should start this post by. Should I do the regular detailed what-time-I-ate and what-was-the-colour-of-the-toilet sort of post or should I just do the brief "college was okaaay" kind. I think I'll settle for something in between. I don't really know what colour the toilet was anyway. I couldn't find it.
Being placed in a new environment has always been a challenge for me. I can't help but feel inferior to everyone around me, even if they were the nicest people on Earth. Going to an orientation at Taylor's I think was even harder. It's true that I have been put in this sort of situation before, especially at camps and whatnot but somehow this is different. The auditorium was filled with about 80 people I think. Most of them guys. It's refrigerator like temperature did not help with the whole get comfortable rule.
My day was mostly filled with plenty of informative lectures. I'm not hesitant to say that I am indeed excited for classes to commence. After my recent mediocre encounter with my SPM results, I'm rather determined to push myself throughout my years in college. Despite saying so, there's some part of me that doubts my capability to do so. My vulnerability to shift focus at any given time is so strong. I am afraid of myself.
I was nervous about the English Placement Test that followed after. Karyn told me before this that it was merely an objective paper and it was as easy as ABC. When the paper came, we were told to write an essay on some invention that has affected many lives. I chose to write about the internet. I thought my essay was satisfactory.
The ADP Student Council came and did a small introduction after lunch. They showed us a video of themselves and their past projects. Seeing them reminded me so much of my club back in school. Seeing them being so confident and outgoing reminded me of some of the kids in my high school. Seeing them suddenly reminded myself of me and my friends while were serving the club. I suddenly felt like shying away from the entire social scene. To hell with making tons of friends and your first day and being super friendly and perky to everyone you see. To hell with having an immense amount of extra-curricular activities and being the most active member out there. To hell with making an impact. It all feels so tiring.
I made a total number of 2 acquaintances today. I was actually prepared not to make any at all. It started with a polite smile in the elevator which then led to a casual conversation and now I'm feeling hopeful about the both of them.
But despite saying all that, I know that having a strong social group and an even stronger extra-curricular participation is vital in the American education system. These are definitely plus points and areas that they will look into when applying into any university anywhere. So, like it or not, I'll have to be as active as I can be.
To sum this up, I'm thinking college will have its momentary ups and definite downs. I have Math tomorrow. What a way to start my academic semester. As always, wish me luck.
