He stood there, so composed, so calm and so cold. Despite standing merely inches away from her, she felt him distant and indifferent. There was nothing in his presence that radiated anything good or warm. Those were lost weeks ago.
She choked back a tear and cursed herself for being so weak. She stared at the dusty floor beneath them. Even the floorboards failed to creak anymore. The silence was eerily deafening. There was nothing good here. Nothing good left between them.
He shifted his feet and continued to stare out the only open window in that small room. It was dusk and soon enough, even the room would turn to reflect how she felt inside- dark.
She summoned all the strength within her to say something but all she could do was inhale the dusty air. There were no words left to be said because even the biggest of words would not be able to divert what was already set in motion.
A tear stained the floor in between them. He cleared his throat.
"I'm leaving." he said.
Just the words she anticipated. Just the words that kept her awake for many nights. Just the words she hoped would never exist. If only her silence would tell him of her agony, of the turmoil he had put her through. Her entire being felt numb. The initial toss of emotions earlier in the evening had disappeared and now all she could do was stand there, projecting nothing to him.
He turned his back against her and headed for the exit.
"Tell me what it takes.." she croaked.
He stood dead his in tracks. Silence enveloped them again. Her breath ever so audible, waiting for his answer. He closed his eyes and lowered his head.
"Nothing. I never expected anything. You shouldn't either." he said swiftly.
She exhaled and brought her arms to her shoulders, hugging herself. She felt as if she could break at any moment and her arms were the only form of security left for herself. The room was now dark and she searched for solace within the darkness and emptiness of the environment she was in.
He'd left her.
---
I'm having such a bad headache and a lot of responsibilities to complete.
My holidays are starting to become dreary. Sigh
The past weekend has been pretty much a letdown. It's not like it totally sucked but it sorta fell flat, you know? Contrary to my expectations for it. Anyhow, we all have to deal with settling for nothing at one point or another. I just hate it though.
I was supposed to be in Genting for 3 days but due to some last minute miscommunication and parental objections, I'm still here, on lower ground. I'm not bummed about missing Genting out because I've probably been there enough to grow tired of the rides. However, I do feel pretty bad for ditching Yeaw Khuan and friends. I'm sorry :( I'll make it up to you one way or another!
Cheryl was over for the night. We had a movie marathon. Watched 2 dramas right up to 5 in the morning. Needless to say, we slept past breakfast and lunch altogether. But Cheryl left early because needed her.
Well, I spent my day typing away on the computer. Yes, I spent that much time with my laptop. Lifeless would be exactly the word you'd use to describe me. That's part of the reason why I've been churning out dark, sappy stories and posting them up here. Skip past it if you're not in the mood for it.
While working on the poster, I messed around with my cameras and got stupid shots of my face.
This is how frustrated I get with photoshop!
Not the best webcam out there.And I was laughing at something, I forgot what though.
Thankfully I have plans for tomorrow! Staying at home sucks.
The new poster done. I give up commenting about it. Just gonna send and hopefully it gets approved. If not, it's back to photoshop for me.
Pictures from last night with the friends will be up once Karyn posts them up. Had another shisha session with Gordan and Jing. I haven't seen them in ages and last night was fun, getting to spend time with them. Although, Gordan had to leave rather early.Some people just don't understand when they've crossed the line. It's one thing to be honest but it's also another to be flat out rude and insensitive. Sometimes, somethings are better left unsaid. Keep your comments to yourself because we all know, you're not saying it out of goodwill. I don't know why you fancy bringing people down. Maybe it gives you an excuse to feel better about yourself and about your life? Whatever it is, it's pathetic and we're better off without your existence anyway.