Did you know we're 2 weeks shy of a new year?
I just realized it a couple of minutes ago.
Time flies. An understatement. What time really does is it speeds up while you are asleep. It races past you and touches the finishing line before you can even take another leap, much less a step further. Time is a thief. Robbing you of your youth and your life.
I cannot really say at this moment if I am happy that my clock is still ticking or that the sun is setting a little bit more lower with every character I type. Am I done being 19? I don't know. Am I ready to be 20? I don't know.
A small part of me says that there won't be any difference either way. It's just a figure.
I am ready however to find my place. I am tired of walking on this tightrope, trying to balance my weight and constantly fixing my posture just to get to the other side. I want an easier route, but then again, don't we all?
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I was going to light a candle in the dark for your birthday. No cakes though, I don't know your favorite flavor. But if I had to guess, I'm thinking something safe, like chocolate or cheese maybe.
I was going to give you a wish. We all have wishes, some sort of want or hope that we hang on to. Some live it out while others keep it tucked in the corner of their hearts. That candle was for you. You wouldn't have to speak a single word to me. I'd understand. And I'd wish for your wish to come true.
I guess I've always knew there would be an ending. I just didn't know when.
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Hey, thank you for coloring the dark realms of my night and filling up the hole where my heart once used to be. Your voice has always been light, airy and somewhat peaceful. Thank you for bringing those lost giggles I thought I'd never hear again.
But I have to go back to the real world now. My world. And if I lose you for good this time, they'll be proud of me for being not much of a dreamer anymore.
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Day 2.
Got lost in the pages of the book I'm reading again. I don't think I ever got out of bed until half past 3.
I feel sedated-- but I like it.
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Rain, rain don't go away
The sun can come back another day.
Someone tell me I can get her record over here.
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