Music: There You'll Be - Faith Hill
I guess you'll be pleased to know that I've given up.
I don't think I can take the games, the guessing, the anticipation of situations. I've reached a point where I don't think I want to put anymore effort into this. It's so tiring. Physically and emotionally. We've always wanted things to be put in black and white. Wouldn't it be easier that way? But I know it never is.
I blame my vulnerability. I blame how prone I am to falling victim to things like this. You might think of it as clean fun but I can't take it that way. It's not you, it's me.
Maybe I blame you partly for taking advantage to a certain extent. Maybe this is why it really hurts: I'm backup. I really hope my judgments serve me wrong this time but honestly, that's what my gut tells me. I'm backup.
So this is it. I'm letting go of something that never existed in the first place and I'll be fine just like before.
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I have so much work!
I hate itttt. It's a Sunday and here I am in front of the computer typing away. Typing out my speech, typing out numerous essays. I'm even editing my friend's essay! As if I don't have enough work already.
I'm steadily falling behind in Math. I think this is about the right time to panic. Gotta start looking out for tutors! Anyone? I'll buy you an ice-cream. Promise.
Wish me luck to endure the last 2 weeks of my semester. Gonna start geeking out B-(
