Music: Defying Gravity - Glee Cast
"I hate you."
Those words I have uttered with pure contempt once. I had said them out of anger and spite and the gravity of the situation, I did not understand.
I was young. And am still young. But I am growing up. I am learning things and I am learning about life, always the hard way.
Daddy,
As I sit in the dark tonight typing away on into this empty space, I finally remember the times you were good to me. Granted, you may not have been the perfect father or a loving one, but you were a responsible one. And I finally understand that, when I am millions of miles away.
I didn't understand why you left bright red marks on my skin when I was younger. I did not understand why you'd raise your voice at me, keeping me from asking questions. I did not understand what it meant to be protective and I did not understand how it's like to love a child.
I don't claim to understand why you did some of the things you did in the past but I think I'm beginning to put the pieces together now.
I heard it in your voice when we were connected by hazy images of one another through a screen. I know why you want me home so badly because, maybe, I'll always be your little girl that didn't grow up. I know why you keep telling me of how you used to hold when I was a baby and now you wonder where the child in me has gone to.
Sometimes, I wonder too, dad.
Tonight, I miss you too, dad. But I am thankful for this sacrifice, because without it, I'd never realize half the things you've done.
I know I've always compared what I had to others but right now, I'd just like to say, I wouldn't you trade you, or mom, or Dexter or Isaac for the world. I've lived 20 years with all of you and I'd gladly live the rest of my life being your daughter and your sister.
I'll always be your baby girl.
Love,
Your daughter
