Music: Nothing Lasts Forever - Maroon 5
It's been sufficiently over a week since I'd last spoken to him.
That's a benchmark for me. For now, at least.
I've been busying myself with the boring tasks of school and trying to find delight in friends and company but I find myself most comfortable being with...myself.
I went shopping today and decided that I'd bake cupcakes for my roommates. And also to relieve some stress from the upcoming finals. Mostly as a form of procrastination however.
I stepped into the expensive baking store in the mall and caught sight of a sock monkey wine bottle cover. Instantly, my thought trailed to his mom.
I remember faces easily. And details. I always remember details and that's why I always find myself writing with a lot of details because it's what I remember most.
His mom had a knack for sock monkeys. I remembered seeing it all over his house up in the mountains. She also liked candles. And inspirational quotes. And grapevines, I suppose. I only had the chance of spending a week up there but the details are still so clear.
I bought the wine bottle cover after walking around the store over and over again. I still haven't figured out how I'm going to give it to his mom but I could make something work, right? Or should I just march myself back to the store and return it.
She is a wonderful person. In the short time that I've gotten to know his family, she quickly became one of my favorite people. She was open and caring yet disciplined. And she was so gracious with her hospitality that I wasn't even remotely hesitant to ask anything of her.
But like Brian, everything else that's attached or linked to him should be in the past, right? That's what I've been working so hard towards. Erasing him from my life, down to the very details that magnified our relationship for me.
It is the minute moments that stand out to me and not the huge arguments we used to have. It is the way he answered the phone, the way he fixed his tie.
And if they are only little things that I remember most, why are they hardest to let go of?
